Today the boys and I went to Sun Harvest. We've been listening to Peter and the Starcatchers and were at the very end of the story when we arrived at the store. I also desperately needed to charge my phone because I couldn't find the charger Mon or Tues. So, we sat in the parking lot with my phone charging via the inverter and listening to the book with the car set on acc power. Apparently this was a bad idea because when I went to start the car after our shopping trip, the battery was dead. I happened to be on the phone with Matthew at the time. I told him that I'd probably call Dad and he suggested seeing if someone in the parking lot could help me. I thought of all the times I'd stopped to help people jump their car and thought about saying a prayer for assistance. Seconds later an employee walked up to my window and asked if everything was ok. I told him that my battery was dead and that I need a jump. He said ok and went to get his truck. Right after he walked off, the car next to me pulled out and moments later he was pulling it. It took maybe 5 minutes and we were good to go. Jared said that he wondered/thinks that the Lord sent him to help us. I told him that absolutely he did. So, we said a prayer of grattitude.
This evening Bro. Hoffmann called regarding the primary attendance statistics. Right as I was getting ready to hang up I heard him call my name like he had a question for me, so I stopped and responded to him. He asked me if there was anything that needed done around the house. I thought of asking him to mow the lawn because it really needs it and the lawn mower quit the last time I did it. I told him that we were good for now because we're still settling in from being gone. He again offered his help and asked that I let him know if I need anything while Matthew was gone because he wants to help.
I can't help but feel the Lord's love and blessings - the bubble of protection that comes from being faithful. This is going to be an amazing year.
***********
Matthew told me today that he feels drawn to applying at Six Flags - which he doesn't really want to do, so he recognized it is the right thing to do! lol One of his concerns was the weekend schedule, but upon further inspection he doesn't think he'll have to worry about it. I believe he is going to go ahead and finish the application. We'll see what happens :)
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Ah-Ha! Job jars
Remember this? Well, last year we took it a step further and blended our points system with the school's color code discipline system and created a flexible reward/punishment program. This has been a great tool in our family dynamics and the boys - especially Jared - respond really well to it. The established system hasn't changed much since it's implementation, but the way to earn points has evolved a bit. Today we had a major breakthrough.
The boys could earn points for be ready for the day by a certain time, answering questions correctly while reading scriptures, being reverent, and doing whatever else we may decide to offer points for. Sometime in the last 6 months Matthew created a job chart and every day we each had a job/chore we had to accomplish. If that assigned chore was done, 5 points would be awarded. For second and third chores, even more points would be acquired. There are a few chores that are accomplished regularly, but most of them are not.
With Matthew gone, I've known I needed to step up and be more quick to act otherwise this is going to be a nightmare year. I'm much harder on the boys and willing to take away their points. When Matthew went to NJ in May for 4 days, the boys spent just about every day on red (no privileges and no chance to earn them back for that day). It was pretty miserable - but I did get a lot of work out of them :). I've drawn on that experience to remind the boys to be obedient, and it has worked. I'm really quick to take away points, but unfortunately often forget to award points so there is little chance to earn their way off of the negative colors. Today Jared was on orange and I wanted to show him something on the tv, but realized he had no privileges so I couldn't. We needed a win-win for earning points. In this moment, inspiration struck.
This weekend when I was at B&J's, I read a clipping from a blog post about job jars. Basically you write down chores to do on index cards or popsicle sticks along with the amount of money earned for accomplishing it. They were using change (3 cents, 25 cents, etc). The rules were that in order to be paid, the job had to be done to mom (or dad)'s satisfaction. The job drawn had to be completed before another job could be picked.
Well, I don't have money to hand out, but I do have points!! So, I presented the idea to Jared (and Aaron). Jared was so excited about it!! I tasked him with thinking of jobs we could write down and he spent about 15 min drawing pictures of work that could be done. His ideas were cleaning the sink, the turtle tank, and cleaning his room. We've tweaked it for us, but the same rules apply.
We (because the boys helped too) used popsicle sticks for our job jar. We made sticks for all the morning and evening jobs: praying, brushing teeth, getting dressed, making beds, etc. We colored the morning jobs yellow and the night jobs blue, and then the sides of the sticks are color coordinated to match their point peg. In the morning (or at night) they can draw which of their routine jobs to do first and will earn 1 point for each job accomplished. Once a tast is completed, they turn the stick over. Points can be earned immediately (thus overcoming an orange or red color before the end of the day).
Each of the boys has a daily routine jar, and then there's a big jar filled with the other assignments. The jobs range from 'cleaning the bathroom sink' to 'jumping to the count of 10'. I threw in a 'read for 10 minutes' and 'write your name 5 times' as well. I broke down cleaning the bedroom to more specific tasks like: put away all the books and throw away the trash. Each task is assigned a point value ranging from 1 - 5 points. I even included two Riley Challenge sticks from Flylady because there will be tasks that she could think of that I would never have. Every time Jared drew a stick tonight he was saying, 'I hope it's not a Riley Challenge' lol
It was amazing to watch the boys tonight. Aaron didn't get as into it as Jared did, but he was still excited about finding out what his job was. Jared did 5 or 6 tasks. He would have done more, but we ran out of time. He ended up cleaning the toilet, reading for 10 minutes, writing his name (he has to use the dry erase board with the lines to practice good letter sizing - in the future he has to do first and last name), wiping up all the dirt spots on the floor (lucky him the floor had been mopped recently), helping with the dishes (again he lucked out b/c there weren't very many), putting away the books (which requires actually putting the books on the shelf the way they belong which was quite the task today) AND he took out the trash (which was his chore for the day). He even put away all the blocks he had pulled out - without complaining and without earning points!!! It was so impressive. He moved so quickly through his bedtime chores and everything. He went to bed happy.
Aaron picked out sweep the bathroom floor (which it desperately needed! YAY!)
It would be naive of me to think that this will happen every day, but for today it worked wonders.
Literally today was one of the best days we've had in a long time. The boys loved helped making their sticks, they got to play, cleaned up without arguing.... Aaron asked to help me with the food I was working on, we had dinner on the table by 6:30, we read scriptures, and the boys were in bed by 7:45 pm without a word (because I threatened they'd go down a color - and Jared worked VERY hard to earn his white). Absolutely incredible.
Oh, and I made a job jar for me too. I put some of the deep cleaning jobs that I often neglect as well as tasks that I want to get done but sometimes end up going undone because I start turning in circles not knowing where to start. This will give me some direction/structure. I also put in there to call one of my VT sisters (one for each of them), practicing piano, writing in my journal - I ought to add some exercise ones.
Hopefully with all of us working through these job jar tasks, our home will be a much more pleasant place to be :)
The boys could earn points for be ready for the day by a certain time, answering questions correctly while reading scriptures, being reverent, and doing whatever else we may decide to offer points for. Sometime in the last 6 months Matthew created a job chart and every day we each had a job/chore we had to accomplish. If that assigned chore was done, 5 points would be awarded. For second and third chores, even more points would be acquired. There are a few chores that are accomplished regularly, but most of them are not.
With Matthew gone, I've known I needed to step up and be more quick to act otherwise this is going to be a nightmare year. I'm much harder on the boys and willing to take away their points. When Matthew went to NJ in May for 4 days, the boys spent just about every day on red (no privileges and no chance to earn them back for that day). It was pretty miserable - but I did get a lot of work out of them :). I've drawn on that experience to remind the boys to be obedient, and it has worked. I'm really quick to take away points, but unfortunately often forget to award points so there is little chance to earn their way off of the negative colors. Today Jared was on orange and I wanted to show him something on the tv, but realized he had no privileges so I couldn't. We needed a win-win for earning points. In this moment, inspiration struck.
This weekend when I was at B&J's, I read a clipping from a blog post about job jars. Basically you write down chores to do on index cards or popsicle sticks along with the amount of money earned for accomplishing it. They were using change (3 cents, 25 cents, etc). The rules were that in order to be paid, the job had to be done to mom (or dad)'s satisfaction. The job drawn had to be completed before another job could be picked.
Well, I don't have money to hand out, but I do have points!! So, I presented the idea to Jared (and Aaron). Jared was so excited about it!! I tasked him with thinking of jobs we could write down and he spent about 15 min drawing pictures of work that could be done. His ideas were cleaning the sink, the turtle tank, and cleaning his room. We've tweaked it for us, but the same rules apply.
We (because the boys helped too) used popsicle sticks for our job jar. We made sticks for all the morning and evening jobs: praying, brushing teeth, getting dressed, making beds, etc. We colored the morning jobs yellow and the night jobs blue, and then the sides of the sticks are color coordinated to match their point peg. In the morning (or at night) they can draw which of their routine jobs to do first and will earn 1 point for each job accomplished. Once a tast is completed, they turn the stick over. Points can be earned immediately (thus overcoming an orange or red color before the end of the day).
Each of the boys has a daily routine jar, and then there's a big jar filled with the other assignments. The jobs range from 'cleaning the bathroom sink' to 'jumping to the count of 10'. I threw in a 'read for 10 minutes' and 'write your name 5 times' as well. I broke down cleaning the bedroom to more specific tasks like: put away all the books and throw away the trash. Each task is assigned a point value ranging from 1 - 5 points. I even included two Riley Challenge sticks from Flylady because there will be tasks that she could think of that I would never have. Every time Jared drew a stick tonight he was saying, 'I hope it's not a Riley Challenge' lol
It was amazing to watch the boys tonight. Aaron didn't get as into it as Jared did, but he was still excited about finding out what his job was. Jared did 5 or 6 tasks. He would have done more, but we ran out of time. He ended up cleaning the toilet, reading for 10 minutes, writing his name (he has to use the dry erase board with the lines to practice good letter sizing - in the future he has to do first and last name), wiping up all the dirt spots on the floor (lucky him the floor had been mopped recently), helping with the dishes (again he lucked out b/c there weren't very many), putting away the books (which requires actually putting the books on the shelf the way they belong which was quite the task today) AND he took out the trash (which was his chore for the day). He even put away all the blocks he had pulled out - without complaining and without earning points!!! It was so impressive. He moved so quickly through his bedtime chores and everything. He went to bed happy.
Aaron picked out sweep the bathroom floor (which it desperately needed! YAY!)
It would be naive of me to think that this will happen every day, but for today it worked wonders.
Literally today was one of the best days we've had in a long time. The boys loved helped making their sticks, they got to play, cleaned up without arguing.... Aaron asked to help me with the food I was working on, we had dinner on the table by 6:30, we read scriptures, and the boys were in bed by 7:45 pm without a word (because I threatened they'd go down a color - and Jared worked VERY hard to earn his white). Absolutely incredible.
Oh, and I made a job jar for me too. I put some of the deep cleaning jobs that I often neglect as well as tasks that I want to get done but sometimes end up going undone because I start turning in circles not knowing where to start. This will give me some direction/structure. I also put in there to call one of my VT sisters (one for each of them), practicing piano, writing in my journal - I ought to add some exercise ones.
Hopefully with all of us working through these job jar tasks, our home will be a much more pleasant place to be :)
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
New Chapter - putting one foot in front of the other.
We should be on the road to Raleigh already, but I'm the only one up and I'm not in a hurry to leave thought we ought to be.
I have such mixed feelings right now. I'm anxious, nervous, scared, and excited all at the same time. I think we'll be fine once we're home because the busy-ness will start, but I'm scared of getting lost along the way. I love what I've seen of NJ. In some ways I think it would have been easier to just move together, but I know Matthew needs to do this on his own.
We were shocked on Sunday to see how large the 2nd ward is. Matthew left wondering why the Lord could possibly need him here when there are already so many people here. It is quite the international ward, and I wonder if his European experience has anything to do with it, but I also feel like Matthew needs these people. Last night we talked to the boys one last time about Matthew staying here and us going back home. Aaron didn't like that idea at all. Jared was so sweet. He was asking if Matthew had anyone here to be his friend that he could talk to when he was feeling sad and lonely. The answer of course was no, and I told Jared that we should pray that daddy will find some good friends here. It was really insightful of Jared.
Two days before we left for NJ, Matthew got an email saying his job offer was withdrawn. We decided to continue moving forward anyway. As we did our budget meeting Sunday night, we realized we are at the end of our rope. The Lord has never left us hanging though and I don't believe He will this time either. This is all just part of the adventure.
I need to get out the door - it's 9:30 and we have an 8 hour drive ahead of us.
I have such mixed feelings right now. I'm anxious, nervous, scared, and excited all at the same time. I think we'll be fine once we're home because the busy-ness will start, but I'm scared of getting lost along the way. I love what I've seen of NJ. In some ways I think it would have been easier to just move together, but I know Matthew needs to do this on his own.
We were shocked on Sunday to see how large the 2nd ward is. Matthew left wondering why the Lord could possibly need him here when there are already so many people here. It is quite the international ward, and I wonder if his European experience has anything to do with it, but I also feel like Matthew needs these people. Last night we talked to the boys one last time about Matthew staying here and us going back home. Aaron didn't like that idea at all. Jared was so sweet. He was asking if Matthew had anyone here to be his friend that he could talk to when he was feeling sad and lonely. The answer of course was no, and I told Jared that we should pray that daddy will find some good friends here. It was really insightful of Jared.
Two days before we left for NJ, Matthew got an email saying his job offer was withdrawn. We decided to continue moving forward anyway. As we did our budget meeting Sunday night, we realized we are at the end of our rope. The Lord has never left us hanging though and I don't believe He will this time either. This is all just part of the adventure.
I need to get out the door - it's 9:30 and we have an 8 hour drive ahead of us.
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